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  • Denby Sheather

The Gift of Being Bullied: How Online Bullying Made Me Stronger



Yep. I've been on the receiving end of some pretty heavy online bullying in the past and let me tell you, it wasn't a fun time at all, made worse by the fact that it was orchestrated and executed by a woman whom I believed to be a trusted friend - a spiritual teacher no less - yet whose jealousy and ego had got the better of her.


I discovered that you can obviously be a b*tch and still chant mantras like a guru.


My story happened a decade ago when I was befriended by a woman interested in similar work. We seemed to have a lot in common and quickly became very close over the course of the next three years. That was, until I started coming into my own psychic power more deeply and wanting to expand my wings within a similar arena (read: industry) as her. No surprise really as a shared love of healing and animals is what had connected us in the first place.


I had already been working as a healing practitioner and yoga therapist for well over ten years mind you, so I was perplexed as to why she reacted as she did; as if I was suddenly trying to take her place or copy what she was all about. She had been a mentor of sorts for me for sure, but there was also a lot of mutual education and sharing going on as well, so the thought that I was inferior or 'less than' her, never occurred to me. My mistake.


This experience actually became a profound catalyst in terms of higher learning, authenticity and integrity for me - as all rites of passage should - because I was shown how 'not to behave' by someone openly professing how perfect and expert they were, to an adoring (and largely ignorant) public. They just wanted to be included and accepted themselves, so I understand why those who got swept up in her tornado, acted as they did.


Since then, I have forgiven both her, myself and all others involved because it's the only sane and logical thing to do. I have made peace with it and replanted my feet firmly with divine knowledge in who I am and what I offer and I actually have nothing but gratitude and appreciation for what she co-created with me because I understand nothing happens by accident. I know why I manifested that scenario onto this plane and I thank her for showing her true self for if she hadn't, I would not have found the courage inside myself to stand up and embody who I am and what gifts I possess. I may not have embraced my calling as quickly or as defiantly, if she hadn't been there pushing me to call the shadow out and keep moving forwards as my authentic self; albeit with a few hundred arrows stabbing me in the back!


When you are exposed to daily verbal attacks, when your character is literally assassinated before your eyes and when your professional motivations and your business intentions are sabotaged as well, it takes every ounce of your shamanic self to stay strong and not react. It's a challenge to show up every day and keep loving yourself when a friend, accompanied by complete strangers, appears to be hellbent on bringing you down.


The extra scary thing about bullying on social media is that suddenly you are being judged and condemned by people who don't event know you, just because someone they follow and trust, starts telling them to.


It's such juvenile and unconscious behaviour, reminiscent of the school yard and the adolescent name calling and hair pulling that we have all been subjected to; or initiated ourselves when navigating puberty. Most people grow out of that phase however and learn how to respect others for their differences, even if they don't agree with them and this is why I was astounded that this person was capable of such horrendous things and deliberately undermining my work - which was then and always has been, to raise eco-awareness and promote conservation. It was almost as if she believed I was copying what she had chosen to focus on as well.


As much as I know I have a unique voice and a particular path in this lifetime to help facilitate change, I don't presume I have exclusive rights to any of the causes or practices I support!


Isn't there enough room on this planet for us all to follow our dreams and make the difference that is so desperately needed? Isn't this how we build the spiritual army we all talk about that will finally transform shadow and unify all hearts; by joining together and holding one another up?


There are millions of rainbow warriors working hard around the world to advocate earth awareness and conservation, such as those brave souls protecting the whale, working to reduce plastic pollution and protesting to save trees and I have always believed that as such, we should band together and support one another, not denounce and defame.


It was a valuable life lesson for me as I embarked on expanding my offerings and showing up with more resolve, confidence and personal conviction in the world and I share it now because we are all being called to leave any residual baggage behind and focus on manifesting a beautiful new earth, together. It's time for us to free ourselves of our inherited (and imagined) fears and reclaim and nurture the sacred connections and missions we were born to complete.


Luckily, because my original master guides had taught me the importance of self inquiry and self ownership, I was quickly able to identify the wounded part within me that had attracted this situation in the first place. Once I cleared that, the lingering karma between me and this person dissolved and I was no longer concerned about anything she did or said, in any way and the great thing is, if I ever come across even the vaguest of similar energies again, I will know exactly how to handle it!


I was liberated and more importantly, I felt safe enough trust in the sisterhood again.


So yeah. I followed my heart and that pissed someone off, but that's what happens when people haven't done the work on themselves (as they profess they have). I hold (detached) hope that this particular sister has healed whatever it was inside of her, that drove her to pursue me with such venom and that she has now found peace and a deeper sense of allowance and respect for all the healers doing what they came here to do.


We're coming to the end of a decade peeps. We just don't have time or space for this kind of spiritual bypass sh*it anymore.


If you are experiencing bullying in any shape or form, please get support and expose the bully (with compassion) so that they can have the opportunity to heal whatever it is within them, that desperately needs to clear and evolve. The perpetrator is always the one needing more help, so try and rise above it, let go of any attachment to how you think they can hurt you (or however they are trying to damage your reputation online and in real life) and de-friend them and anyone else associated with them so you don't keep feeding into their low vibration.


And remember: if someone finds you that interesting enough to bully, have compassion because it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out that that they are unhappy with themselves and frustrated with their own life. If you unwittingly become someone's 'target', it means you are doing something right and good because you are stirring them to action and waking up that part inside them that doesn't serve them (or the collective) anymore.


Try and take it as a compliment, release yourself from them energetically and send them nothing but love as you waltz away into your amazing future!


AHO


Image @chrissabor

© 2018 Denby Sheather