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Red, Blue, And Black: The Downside Of Awakening



“What is imagined and willed becomes actuality – herein lies the danger as well as the way out”. (Nisargadatta Mahara)


According to Neil Sedaka, “breaking up is hard to do”, but I would suggest that “waking up” is even harder.


“Waking up”, or when one becomes aware of “reality”, which incorporates worldly surroundings and collective patterning, along with personal circumstances in the form inner stories, attachments, and spiritual motivations, will probably be the most challenging adventure any of us undertakes in our lifetime, so what do we mean when we say it, and what will it (mostly) look life? Let’s explore.


Most of us are familiar with the “red pill/blue pill” concept thanks to the wild success of The Matrix movie franchise, but not as many have realized (yet), just how profound and precise a disclosure, these films really are.


The blue pill is where we all begin. Unaware we are unaware.


The red pill offers change. It is the seed of potential waiting to ignite inside us all.


But there is another pill we can swallow, and often without realizing we have, and that is the black pill.


The black pill will surely usher you down some next level rabbit warrens as you face the darkest aspects of yourself and this isn't just where you realize your shadow is an aspect of you that you can witness from within; it's where it manifests physically as a very deep, and very dark expression of your core wound. The black pill is demonic in every sense of the word, and unlike the other two, is more than capable of “infecting” or harming other people because it carries the energetic of complete desolation and indifference. But as such, it also contains the very antidote to our suffering. When taken, digested, and assimilated correctly, the black pill can turn out to be our greatest ally. Nothing in Nature exists without a remedy remember.


With the blue pill, you stay comfortably numb, safe inside your ignorant bubble. You can’t really hurt anyone else, certainly not physically, because you’re not aware of what you’re not aware of. It’s all about you, your needs, your security, and self-preservation, and so you aren’t really interested in what anyone else thinks, says, or does because you are encapsulated within your selfish reality.


With the red pill, you obviously become more activated thanks to your newfound attention and increasing ability to see through illusions, and whilst your words and actions do carry weight and influence, they have a limited capacity to “harm” or affect others, because you are more cognizant of maintaining the boundaries of free will. You are still relatively selfish (because all humans are programmed to be so, until we’re not), but you also start to be more concerned about the welfare of others, thanks to your ability to now see through and beyond the veil. People can either choose to listen to you or ignore what you say, obviously, and when they don’t, you will eventually move on to connect with others on the same page as yourself and allow the “sleepers” their necessary journeys. Picture the “you can lead a horse to water” scenario here.


With the black pill however, those invisible boundaries are disregarded, and you become a radical instrument for forcing your will, and your pain, onto others, through the deliberate execution of physical action. You don’t care what pill others have swallowed; your delusion demands they all comply with your will no matter what, or suffer the consequences.


Black pilled people decide to take the law, including Natural Law, into their own hands. They see themselves as a “soldier of God”, but not in the positive way the scriptures encourage. Free will becomes viscerally offensive to them.


One of the first things we learn as spiritual seekers, is how dangerous self-denial can be and how important it is to heal it. The act of ignoring and suppressing one’s trauma, ensures it will fester internally. Our own wounding is what corrupts our thoughts and ability to reason and perceive. It atrophies our emotional center, our heart, and disrupts our energetic integrity, making us either hyper empathic, or devoid of feeling, which then leads to various forms of self-abuse as we subconsciously diminish our worth and our innate wisdom, even further.


All this leads to one very damaged, very sad, and very isolated individual, someone consumed by their pain, often wildly vengeful, and disconnected from everything that is good and godly in the world. The person imprisoned within this dense frequency will then begin to view life only through the lens of regret, oppression, and inferiority, and if left to their own devices for long enough, these people will begin to project their warped beliefs and observations, from thought-form, into actual 3D plans, and in the direction of those they believe deserve to be punished.


They will, essentially, take their internal battle of attack, outward, and start to exorcise attacks against others. This also makes them the perfect scapegoats for authorities wishing to push certain social agendas and deflect attention from their own grim activities.


The black pill is more than capable, in fact I would suggest it is responsible for, acts of extreme violence including terrorism, rape, torture, and murder. These vibrations can only be attributed to the demonic realms and are not open for individual interpretation. Please note I am speaking to the phenomena we are witnessing within the spiritual community, not those individuals commonly depicted as "incels", the sub-culture of misogynistic males who take romantic rejection so personally, that they justify stalking, maiming, and even killing.


There should be no discussion in defense of “death for death’s sake”, for that would be defending evil. Darkness may very well stem from the same origins of source light and need healing and inclusion, but to argue that any one person has the right to kill another, for any reason, delusional or otherwise, is absolutely a Universal Crime.


It’s interesting to note here, that every “shooter” (in the USA), has been observed and confirmed to be a sociopath and/or narcissist, and nine times out of ten, also dealing with not just personality issues, but "body dysmorphia" disorders as well. These people harbor deep, unaddressed psychological trauma. There also appears to be a very fine line between activism and terrorism, if you go by the data provided in the wake of the Denver, Colorado, Nashville, and Aberdeen shootings, that is. All culprits have identified as either “trans” or “non-binary”. Whether you accept those facts or not is up to you, but I think we can all agree that when mentally unstable (and unsupported) people withdraw from society and isolate themselves, the odds of them becoming vigilantes for a cause very few can comprehend, greatly increases.


The above examples may seem extreme or rare to you as you read this, but black pilling is way more prevalent than many of us realize, and ironically, it is thriving within the “Truther” and “Freedom” Movements. How can this be?


Cracking oneself open to consider, process and integrate intense truths about the world, is not an easy task. Some people are good at this, even relish in it, whilst others vehemently reject any form or hint of change to their lives because it’s just too much to bear. For those who have made the choice to “rip off the band aid” and look life square in the eyeballs, they know and accept that their life will never be the same again. They know they can’t “unsee” and “unknow” the horrors that accompany waking up to the world and all the nefarious forces and people behind it, and yet they cannot ignore their heart’s impulse to do so.


Once you cross the threshold and say “yes” to growth, there is no going back. You simply must also accept at that point, that your intuition is not just going to confirm your good psychic “hits” and predictions; it’s also going to shove raw, and often highly uncomfortable truths, right up in your craw too. So, when you choose to “wake up”, you must also make a silent agreement with yourself, to receive it all, the good, the bad, and the ugly, no matter what.


The good news is, with time, this does get easier. For most of us. For others however, it can signal the beginning of their end, and I believe, through personal and professional experience, that this has everything to do with how much inner work one has embarked upon, before being presented with either of the primary pills.


In other words, if you haven’t reached a (certain level) of inner peace and acceptance of who you are, what has happened to (or rather, for) you in your life, and you lack any faith or connection to something “greater” than yourself, you will automatically be more vulnerable to collapse. You will continue to see everything that happens on the world stage, as bleak, depressing, and hopeless, and that truly isn’t a healthy head or heart space to embody, especially if you consider yourself a “light worker” or healer in any way. Filtering everything through density and despair, will eventually not only destroy your own light, but will also lessen your ability to fulfill your soul mission here, whatever that is for you.


Statistics show that gunmen, serial killers, even financial and environmental saboteurs, all share similar energetic or psychological characteristics. They are all “faulty” in some way because of the shocking and unresolved traumas they carry, hence they are quite capable of conjuring up, and executing, heinous acts of terror against people, animals, and the planet if given even the slightest opportunity. They are fragmented within, and often also genetically damaged, and when someone is thinking, feeling, and living from across-the-board fragmentation, there is very little hope for positive outcome.


That is a small percentage of the population though. I’m talking about the rest of humanity, those of us who don’t descend from psychopathic bloodlines and that do have the ability to discern, reason, and always choose life, and love, when faced with the option.


From the New Age perspective, black pilling may be less radical and not involve the burning of churches or mowing down of innocent school kids, but it can be just as damaging to the self.


There is a massive burden that accompanies “waking up”, as anyone who has, will attest to. It takes daily work to maintain healthy inner dialogues, as well as appropriate and grounded boundaries when expressing oneself, and connecting with community in the various ways that we do. How you feed yourself, also makes a huge difference to your mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical health.


Jumping online to spew your latest revelation or frustration to a platform of souls already sensitive to what is going on, is perhaps not the most “light” or responsible thing to do, and yet, we have all done it, me included. It has taken a while for me to complete this phase of my spiritual growth and get to the point where I am no longer agitated by what is unfolding. I do not consent to the fuckery of course, and it saddens my heart beyond words, but I choose a different response now. Instead of getting all fired up and draining my personal energy, I accept that this is a prison planet we are inhabiting and that certain things need to roll out and be experienced by the collective, so that more humans can learn for themselves that this is a prison planet we are inhabiting! Personal desires and visions aside, there are certain things beyond our control, and right now our ability to adapt is crucial to not just our survival on this plane, but to the legacy we generate for ourselves in the afterlife once all is done and dusted.


We collapse into lower states of consciousness as a group but must free ourselves from the Wetiko “mind-virus”, one at a time.


Hence, the more energy we give to the growing number of disasters and disturbances around the globe, the more we drain ourselves and fuel the matrix machine. Fixating on chemtrails, impending bank calamities, the trans-gendering of the next generation, and a global food apocalypse for example, which are all highly likely by the way, doesn’t do our psyche any good.


Bad sh*t is happening in the world whether we like it or not, that’s just how this realm rolls, for the time being anyways. There is not a lot we can do to shift what needs to come to pass for evolutionary benefit either, because this physical plane is an illusion, a predetermined “game” governed by rules and algorithms, as Neo and Co. discover, and there is no point trying to engage with, or change, something that has no actual substance. You can’t fight fire with fire and expect to win in other words, and you certainly can’t beat “Satan” at his own game, and in his own hood, which Earth is. You will always end up as collateral damage, which is why all the ancient texts highlight the necessity of removing oneself from the illusions of this world, detaching from the five senses, mastering one’s mind, and seeking to “transcend” (or “ascend”) above the attachments that it offers.


They knew the work back then, and we need to remember it here and now.


The recognition, and then embodiment, that you are not your human suit and that your spirit is immortal, is perhaps the key here.


People who have grown through this part of the Heroes Journey, appear to be able to deal with life with more equanimity and peace, than those who are still beholden to the prison, and therefore, still believe this world is all there is for them to experience. This is such a limiting viewpoint, and yet billions have encapsulated themselves within this frequency, for their own reasons and lessons of course. We cannot do anything to change that for them because they must live as their soul’s desire, but witnessing their constructed demise, at their own hands, is nothing short of torturous for the awakened human, especially when it is our own families and beloveds we are watching, self-destruct.


The black pill is one all spiritual seekers will be tempted to take at some point.


Some may just place it on their tongue and get a sharp taste of what it offers before rejecting it, while others will knock it back with cheap scotch, filled with bravado and prepared to risk everything, including their sanity alongside their soul. Whether they realize in the doing, that they are opening doors of decimation and creating the space to involve others in their path of self-annihilation, I don’t know, but I do believe the energetic state of our collective society plays a far bigger role in this, than we currently acknowledge.


When one of us goes off the rails, it’s rarely random, and it impacts us all, eventually, if not immediately. “Random”, “coincidence” and “accidents”, are not possible within an imitation because the very function of a carbon copy, is to repeat and regurgitate. These “glitches” are built into the simulation as part of the program. You just need to look at the schooling system, aka indoctrination camps, to get that. Individuality is discouraged and conformity is rewarded.


We each get to where we are, both as human and as spirit, through a series of unexpected (and yet totally pre-organised) events. On a soul level, we agreed to return here to either exact revenge, fulfill a dying wish, honor an obligation, make amends, reunite with/find soulmates, attain wealth and "success", the list goes on. We accepted the offer, a contract, one that was proposed by the plethora of dodgy beings awaiting us on the other side that masquerade as light beings and loved ones in the etheric after we left our physical bodies the last time. We succumbed to our attachments, basically.


So, once we’re here again, we make new earthly choices, some good and some not so good, and these all have consequences. As humans though, we do have a latent and un-evolved habit of making things “someone else’s fault” and labeling situations as “bad luck”, things we also often attribute to having had a tough upbringing, neglectful or abusive parents, or being left to our own devices (and on a device), and therefore not accountable for our own actions. We refuse to see that we have always been complicit in our own stories and that nothing happens here “by chance” because it’s way easier to point the fingers of blame and guilt elsewhere, anywhere else, but at ourselves, the original perpetrators.


We are responsible for our own happiness, and equally, for our own suffering.


As someone who has engaged with both the alternative health and allopathic models for over two decades, I have no qualms in stating that the latter is designed to propagate pain and trauma, not prevent it. I also have no problem saying whilst I agree in part that “we’re all in this together”, that most people have no idea what “being together” truly means because they aren’t unified within themselves. After the last four years, surely, we should all know the importance of self-sovereignty by now.


Do we even “take” the black pill, or does the red one we swallowed previously, just mutate organically into it, so colored if we don’t remain vigilant to constant stressors, and lose all sight of hope?


I know from personal experience that the black pill is truly toxic and needs to be purged immediately once you recognize its influence within yourself. You simply must dig deeper if you are to resolve any dormant fears about where you have come from, the power you have in the present moment, and where you are moving towards. Allowing next level fear, which is what the black pill is, to take the reins and infuse your heart and soul, unsupervised, will only dampen your faith in the long run and thwart your natural impulse to create and be of service, and that my friends, is exactly why you woke up in the first place.


If you relate to any of this and sense you have one foot in both camps so to speak, spit the black pill back in the bucket immediately. Rinse your field and set yourself back on track to being a beacon of unconditional love and empowerment before any further energetic erosion can take place. Then thank the black pill for showing you the edge of your truth, and pull yourself right back from the edge. You'll know where this is instinctively. It's the feeling you have slipped far enough away from whom you know yourself to be and that it's now time to parent yourself back into presence. Remind yourself that whilst, yes, the world is most definitely a crazy simulation and there are myriad travesties occurring, there is also incredible beauty and wonderous creativity refusing to wither and succumb to the assault of synthetic grids being impregnated over it every day. Hold strong to your essence and let all else go, with loving allowance.


We “fight” by staying in our light, not by shouting the loudest from the rooftops. When we respond by putting more joy and positivity out into the world, they can only observe us as thriving and overcoming, despite their constant attempts to crush, kill, and destroy. And that really gets their goat.


When we radiate our truth and highest purpose in this way, as the sacred technology that we are, we simultaneously have a greater impact on those around us who may still be struggling with finding and trusting their own. Such is the journey of self-mastery and living as a way-shower without interfering with another’s path.


Face your own darkness and embrace your shadow every day so you won’t be tempted to swallow a pill version of it down the track, otherwise, you may just bruise and batter yourself from red, through black, and then back into blue, from love and light back to lack and loss. And that is exactly what they want.


So don’t give it to them. Give them a dose of their own medicine, through the activation of your own, and find peace in the knowing that everything is happening so that we each may get what we came here for.


AHO































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